Intro: Patrick: Hey this is pat and you're watching Jake and Amir Amir: nope, you ruined it. Patrick: No you ruined it. [starts, Amir and Mike at their desks.] Amir: Hey Mike, can I talk to you about something? Mike: Yes, of course. Amir: Sarahs trying to start a rumor that you're gay... Mike: [nods] Okay? Amir: Yeah! I didn't know what that meant either. I guess gay has an alternate definition where like even though you're not a woman, right? Mike: Right. Amir: Right, so even though you're not a woman you still want to have sex with me? Mike: yeah, that's right. Amir: alright, so now I am confused. You are a woman? Mike: Amir, why do you think i've been hanging out with you all week? Amir: to be my friend? Mike: I'm trying to get laid! Amir: what? Mike: are you really this stupid? Why would i want to be friends with somebody as dumb as you? Amir: i thought we were partners.. Mike: I thought so too amir, we went to the movies. Amir: Yeah? Mike: for like five nights in a row! Amir: So? Mike: we french kissed! Amir: [high pitched] is that what that was? Mike: Oh my god. I did it again..I did it again! Amir: So we're not best friends. Mike: listen to me carefully, i never want to see your dumb ass, face slang hurling wanna be chill dude, cock tease! Amir: Shhhh! Mike: in my face again. Amir: okay..relax. Mike:And your free styles suck. Amir: [snorts] Mike: They don't rhyme! Amir: [shrugs] so? Mike: Bye. Amir: well..im not going to leave.. Mike: Micheal, you have to move again [picks up plant from desk] how does this keep happening. It's like portland all over again. I've had to move nine times this month, austin, miami, fresno, barcelona, its all the got damn same. [In Jakes office he corners amanda in the kitchen] Jake: hey so I've been thinking about what you said, about who's obsessed with who. And I may have stumbled across something interesting, believe it or not. Amanda: Really? Jake: Yes, amanda panda Somewhere in you incoherant ramblings, you got me thinking. Maybe i'm having a hard time letting amir go. Not the other way around. Amanda: well..maybe i can help you with that. [leans in to kiss jake] [jake holds up phone and amanda kisses it] Jake: this is him! He's calling me right now, he hasn't called me since I moved. Amanda: Okay. If you answer that I wont be here when you hang up. Jake: that's fine ill come find you after. Amanda: no, jacob you have to chose. It's either him, or me. ~end~