INTRO AMIR: Hey, your watching Jake. JAKE: ...And Amir. AMIR: Well I'm only watching you. JAKE: Jesus. AMIR: (videotaping Basilio doing parkour) Ohhh yeah boy! JAKE: Hey, dude, your 48 frantic texts said you were getting robbed. AMIR: Hey wanna see something amazing? JAKE: I came here because I thought you were in danger. (Basilio does a flip) AMIR: Ahhh! Danger of missing that cupcake! (laughs) JAKE: You swore on your father's life that you just witnessed a double murder. You were hiding in a garbage can because you saw two Puerto Rican deli workers get hacked to bits? Your voice mail ended with you saying I think they see me and then six minutes of screaming. AMIR: How'd you like to be famous on YouTube? JAKE: I wouldn't. AMIR: Bull spit. Hey, that's my friend Basilio, okay? He's a professional parkour-doer-guy-thing. JAKE: Doesn't sound like the correct name for that, right? (Basilio does a flip) AMIR: Ahhhhh! (grabs Jake) JAKE: Okay, seriously, don't touch me! Alright? Why did you invite me here? AMIR: Hey, you think that's good? JAKE: I guess. AMIR: Read it and weep! JAKE: Read what? AMIR: (hands Jake the camera) Hold that. (Amir tries to do a flip, runs into the wall, and falls on the ground) Oh ganked that! False start, unless, did I stick it? I didn't get a good vantage point of it. JAKE: Did you feel like you ran up the wall and did a back flip? AMIR: I don't know, maybe. It just... Basilio says that you lose yourself in the zone, right? You get into like this zone and you just sort of can't really tell what's going on anymore, so maybe I stuck it and I just wasn't aware. JAKE: He hits a zone, you hit the wall. AMIR: No, I think I did it. I think I stuck the landing too, which is the hardest part, right B? JAKE: Your first reaction was to say Ah, ganked that. Do you think that was a good thing? AMIR: It's a great thing in parkour, it's a great thing to say that. BASILIO: It's not. AMIR: What do you know, man, okay? You don't know jack. It is! JAKE: He's the professional, and he says it's not. AMIR: Yeah, well he's a little bitch that knows less about parkour than you do! (groans with pain) JAKE: Okay, don't do that. He's obviously being nice and trying to teach you. BASILIO: I wasn't teaching him anything; he's been following me around with his video camera for three hours! AMIR: Okay, freestyle walking is all about self expression! JAKE: Wow! Oh my God, your arm is dislocated bad. (Amir's arm is bent all the way backwards) AMIR: Small price to pay for landing it square. Help me up! (Jake pulls Amir's dislocated arm to help him up, pulls it out further) AMIR: Ahhh!