Jake is sitting at table. Amir comes in with a bag over his head shrieking. JAKE: Jesus Christ! Amir takes the bag off of his head. AMIR: (Laughing) I'm just kidding. Not that you'd even care if I tried to kill me. Would you? JAKE: No. AMIR: Okay. Let's start from the ze-top. Filling out our men's basketball bracket. I'll start. Division I Men's Bracket Opening Round Game vs. March 18th. Who ya got? JAKE: Let's start lower with an actual team. North Carolina vs. Mount St. Mary. AMIR: 16 - 1 already. So, once you're up 20, there's no going back. I'd be a fool to go for North Carolina in this situation. M T S T Mary, thank you. JAKE: Okay, you can't do math. Also, this isn't a scoreboard. These are their seeds. AMIR: Okay. Not gonna change my pick. JAKE: You are though. I'm watching you. AMIR: (Covering his bracket) Don't cheat. [Jump cut] AMIR: What'd you get for Indiana? JAKE: I just wrote Indiana. AMIR: Me too. (Amir scribbles something) JAKE: No, you're drawing a picture of me. AMIR: How can you tell? JAKE: Because the hair's. AMIR: Because the pearly white teeth. JAKE: Stop. [Jump cut] AMIR: Moving on. By U vs. Texas A (Jake mouths BYU) and M. So it's two teams against one, it would be a sucker's bet to go for anybody but these Texas teams. JAKE: You know you're an idiot, but I got Texas AM too, so. AMIR: Texas A or M? Okay, you can't (laughs) have them both, okay. So, I'll take Baylor and Perda over Zav-. How do you - when a word starts with an x, what is that? [Jump cut] AMIR: You smell super good today by the way bro. JAKE: C'mon. AMIR: What?! JAKE: That. [Jump cut] AMIR: St. Mary's and then also Mount St. Mary's. So, this bracket's already busted, right? So. Let me tear it and we'll start it from there. (Amir begins tearing his bracket) JAKE: Ok, Those - there are two St. Mary's teams. AMIR: Okay, that's fine. I'll just tape it back together. It's not the first time I made that mistake. JAKE: You can tell. AMIR: What. Barely. [Jump cut] AMIR: Oral Roberts (Laughs) What is that - Is that team about having butt sex with each other? JAKE: That's immature and the wrong innuendo. [Jump cut] AMIR: Baylor, straight to da final tree. JAKE: It's final four. AMIR: Not when you're that good. From way downtown. (Throws pen across room like a basketball) Ah sheesh, can I borrow your pen? [Jump cut] Amir is circling something. AMIR: From way downtown. (Throws pen across the room like a basketball again) JAKE: C'mon. [Jump cut] Amir is now holding a pink highlighter. AMIR: We should write a movie about two guys that predict scores. JAKE: It's already a movie. [Jump cut] AMIR: Texas versus Austin P. Ooo I like Austin P. (does an Austin Powers impression) in the final four baby, yeah! JAKE: It's not very likely. AMIR: (Still doing Austin Powers impression) Oh does that prediction make you horny? JAKE: It makes me sad. AMIR: Same th- Same thing. [Jump cut] JAKE: Do you even have the $5 buy in? AMIR: Um, nay. But, I have a feeling Mr. Hamilton (takes out $5 bill) will persuade the bracket masta. Jake takes $5 bill from Amir and throws it on the table. Amir quickly snatches it back. [Jump cut] AMIR: Lightning round! UCLA! (Amir is scribbling something) JAKE: You're just drawing lightning. AMIR: Or whatever. JAKE: Not or whatever. You are. AMIR: San Diego. (Draws something and looks at Jake) JAKE: Write it! AMIR: That's a chill bolt. [Jump cut] Amir is laughing hysterically. AMIR: Oral Roberts. [Jump cut] AMIR: Alright, this is taking way too long. (To Jake) We got dinner to go to. JAKE: We don't. [Jump cut] AMIR: Finals. San Antonio vs. who? JAKE: The finals are in San Antonio. You need to pick two teams. AMIR: Alright. (Amir writes something and looks at Jake) JAKE: It's Jake. Jake wins it all. AMIR: Sorry. I thought that's where we put our name. JAKE: It's my name. AMIR: It's our name. [Jump cut] Jake gets up from his chair. AMIR: Wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wait. Just tell me- How do you pronounce this: Day-u-k-e? [Jump cut] AMIR: West Vir - There's a West Virginia? Link