INTRO: (2011-2012 Jake and Amir Intro with no voiceover) [Jake and Amir are sitting on a couch, talking to the camera.] JAKE: (claps) First of all, thank you guys for donating. AMIR: Yes, very cool, very cool. JAKE: Very cool, very cool indeed. So thank you again. AMIR: Yes, rock on. JAKE: (to Amir) I feel like you're trying not to say thank you. AMIR: Well they didn't do anything for me! AMIR: (to the camera) We wanted to give a little love to those who donated more, so if you donated less than five dollars, you guys are rock stars, keep kickin' butt, every dollar counts, but: please press stop now. (smiles and waits a beat.) (to Jake) Alright, those cheap bastards are gone, so-- JAKE: Hey, what are you doing?-- AMIR: (untangling Jake's hands from his arms) Our boss forced us to do this! JAKE: He does not speak for me!-- AMIR: Against our will! JAKE: He doesn't speak for me. AMIR: When CollegeHumor recently said they wanted to help with Japan relief, I said count me in, what can I do to help?. JAKE: Actually you said what's going on in Japan? Sorry, I DVR the news and I'm a year behind. AMIR: Ok, don't you think Conan's being kind of a douche about this whole Jay Leno thing? I mean, all the guy wants is his show back. AMIR: If every one of you doubles what you've donated already, we can give twice as much,, to charity. JAKE: (to Amir) Well, they've already donated. AMIR: (to the camera) Well, when it comes to giving you can never give enough, so double what you've given, so we-- JAKE: Ok but they have given; they gave; that's ok-- AMIR: Well, give more, specifically double as much-- JAKE: How much money did you give? AMIR: Didn't need to. Making the video. JAKE: You're barely doing that. (Amir smiles a strange smile.) You're doing a bad job. AMIR: (Singing Don't Stop Me Now by Queen) Tonight, I'm gonna have myself a real good time, I-- JAKE: Sorry, do you think we stopped making the charity video? AMIR: This is.. it-- for them, ok? It's a gift! AMIR: Ok I'm sorry but it's sixty-one degrees out right now, and Al Gore is complaining about Global Warming. Something doesn't add up, right? JAKE: Ok you're pretty far behind in the news, huh? And sixty-one degrees IS pretty warm, for March, in New York-- AMIR: I just hope he doesn't win this recount, I mean I'm sorry, aeaheha (stuttering)-- JAKE: Wow, you're further behind than I thought! JAKE: (singing How to Save a Live by the Fray) Where did I go wrong, she lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness, and I, would have stayed u-- AMIR: We're good. Hey! We already have my song, that's enough. AMIR: From Jake (gestures at himself) and Amir (gestures at Jake), thanks again (blows a kiss at the camera). JAKE: Don't do that man, that really freaks me out, ok I'm Jake, you know that, right?-- AMIR: Well we can both be Jake.. (pats Jake hard on the shoulder) for a day! (laughs) JAKE: Oh my God that's exactly what I'm talking about, it's really creepy. AMIR: (quietly) Yeah. (to the camera) Two Jakes say: we're gone (holds up a peace sign). END.