INTRO Amir - Hey, you're watching Jurassic Park. Jake - Jake and Amir. Amir - Same difference! (Amir is scribbling in a notebook) JAKE: Hey, can I ask you a question? Why are you always writing in your notebook and never on your computer? AMIR: Can I ask you question? Stand up so I can see your jeans. JAKE: That's not a question. Let me see your notebook. (Amir throws the notebook over Jake's head) JAKE: What are you doing? (mumbled as he's getting the notebook) I ask and you throw over, you're an asshole. (back at desk) OK, 'Dear Diary-- AMIR: It's a journal. JAKE: You write diary! You start every entry with 'dear diary'. AMIR: As a goof. JAKE: On who?? You wrote, 'dear diary, Jake hasn't complimented me in a million days' which sounds like an exaggeration because two days ago in a date marked October and 40th-- AMIR: All Hallow's Eve. JAKE: Nope. You wrote, 'Jake complimented me today.' Which I actually don't remember. AMIR: Yeah! You were texting, OK? And someone said something that made you laugh, and you were smiling, and then you looked up at me and like, you know, once-- JAKE: (reading) 'once our eyes met, his smiled turned instantly into a scowl, but for that moment, he was all smiles and it was like a-- AMIR and JAKE: Dream'. AMIR: Yeah, exactly. JAKE: You count that as a compliment? AMIR: Yeah! That's a win! OK, I count that as a 'W' in the old diary. JAKE: I thought it was a journal. AMIR: That's a journal. (holding up a scroll) This is a diary. JAKE: That's a scroll. Let me see your backpack. (Amir tosses Jake his backpack) JAKE: Yeah. This is just filled with notebooks and scrolls. AMIR: Dinner tonight? JAKE: Wow, please don't start saying that again. AMIR: I barely say it anymore! JAKE: You used to say it all the time. AMIR: Exactly, and that's why it's funny to do that. JAKE: What? AMIR: You say stuff over and over, OK? That's what makes it funny. JAKE: Yeah but it gets old and repetitive. AMIR: No, no- JAKE: You have to change it up a little. AMIR: No, no! In a perfect world, everything would always stay the same. OK, nothing would ever change, you know that. JAKE: Wow, yeah, you wrote that in your diary. AMIR: Journal. JAKE: No! This was on the scroll! AMIR: OK, we're still a go-ies(?) then? JAKE: Oh my god. AMIR: Just give me my old scroll bag backpack back, please. THE END. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NwVm0lS1m0