Opening Sequence Jake: Hey, you're watching Jake and Amir. Amir: Duh. Jake: Why do you have to be in the room? Amir: I'm lonely. Episode (Jake is playing How to Train Your Dragon) Jake: Dammit, stop! (Amir comes up to Jake with a Smirnoff ice) Amir: Um, I believe this ice is for you. Jake: Um— Amir: As you have just been iced! Jake: Okay, I am not playing Bros Icing Bros. Amir: Chug it, pledge! Jake: This game was popular like two months ago, and nobody's playing anymore. Amir: Do you have any idea what the punishment is for a bitching bro who doesn't wanna chug his ice? Jake: No. Amir: Okay, me neither. I was hoping you would. The website's kind of hazy on that. Jake: I think you just get deactivated from the game or something. Amir: No no no! It has to be a more severe punishment than that. Jake: Just, shh! I don't know what it is because I'm not playing— Amir: Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug— Pat: Shut up! Amir: Sorry. You wouldn't want—you wouldn't want me to apologize though if you knew what this bro was doing, you'd want me to yell chug, cause this guy—you wouldn't—you'd know— Jake: Can you finish a sentence properly? You're stuttering, you just, y-y-y-you can't say anything right! Amir: Okay you're frustrating me! You're— Jake: Well still, you should be able to talk! Why don't you chug it? Amir: Gladly! (Amir chugs it) Jake: Okay, now you're without an ice, so (grabs an ice), I ice you. Amir: What. Jake: You don't have an ice; I'm icing you. Amir: Well, I think there's a rule that says you can't really chug two in a row, because— Jake: Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! (Amir chugs it) Amir: And now, since you don't have an ice, I will ice (grabs an ice) you! (Jake grabs an ice) Jake: Ice blocked! Sorry, now you gotta drink them both. Amir: How do you have that?! Jake: Why are you so drunk already? Amir: I was iced twice on the way to work! Jake: Wow, on the way to work? Amir: Once on the subway, and once right in the lobby of our building!