Jake: Hey, you're watching Jake and Amir. Amir: Who, me? Jake: No, you're recording an intro for it. Amir: Of course. Amir: Welcome to the new age. To the new age. To the new age. To the new rage! Jake: Nice. Amir: Yeah, homeboy's got a Garmin. Jake: That's a TomTom. Amir: No! Jake: It really doesn't matter. Amir: You say that now because you had nothing to do with this. Jake: What? Amir: I saved up for this moment both emotionally and financially, hoping to one day rub your fucking nose in this shit like I was training a puppy to go potty outside. And now you're telling me it's not even a Garmin? Jake: Yeah, and I never cared, either way. Amir: Yeah, but I did. Jake: Right. Amir: Right. Jake: Bad way to train a dog, by the way. And why the fuck do you care about having a GPS? Don't you have a map on your phone? Amir: Yes, but not on my dash. Jake: It doesn't matter. Amir: Oh my God, I'm gonna cry. Jake: You're already crying. Amir: I really think I'm about to start crying. Jake: Don't say you're about to cry, you're mid-cry. Amir: I think I'm about to cry. Jake: You came into work 45 seconds ago, six hours late by the way, and immediately you're so sad and flustered. Amir: Wanna know the worst fart? Jake: Gross. Amir: I honestly, literally thought this would work. Jake: I know. Amir: Like, I got a briefcase for this shit. That's not like me. Jake: It kind of is. Amir: How? I've never had a briefcase before. Jake: Yeah, but you bring in like random props to elevate your dumb ideas. Amir: Sure, I can see that, but I did so in thinking that in my heart of farts, Jake: Can you please stop doing that? Amir: That this thing would make me whole. I feel like I would be a better person if I got a TomTom. Jake: Garmin. Amir: Fuck, I can't keep the two straight. Jake: At least you're growing enough to know that is the worst part. Amir: What? Jake: What? Amir: What? Jake: Why are you saying it like that? Pronounce the W. Amir: What? Jake: Never mind. Look, you said, \"Do you want to know the worst part?\" Fuck you! That's disgusting. It reeks in here, right? I'm going home. Amir: What the hell? No. No way. This is not... Jake: Ah! Give me! Sorry bud. Amir: That's my GPS. Jake: Actually this was your GPS, but now this is my GPS. Amir: Don't you have an OnStar? Jake: I do have an OnStar, but that's roadside assistance. That's theft protection bud. That's not exactly navigation, now is it? Amir: You said you didn't need it on your dash 'cause you had it on your phone. Jake: Yes, I don't need it on my dash because now I have it on my dash because you gave it to me and now you need it on your dash. This is that fuck you GPS. This is that fuck you navigation. All I have to do, mount it on the dash, plug it right in. Is this the mini USB? This should really be USB-C, bud. You said this was a Garmin. Amir: I thought it was a Garmin. You said it was a TomTom. Jake: No! No! Amir: No! No! Jake: Ow! No! Amir: Ow! Ow! Jake: Ow ow ow! Amir: It's not the most precious thing in the world. Jake: I'm gonna go home. Amir: No. No way. I'm doing nothing to stop you. Jake: The power situation on here, the mini USB. Why would it be a mini USB? It should be USB-C, bub. You didn't spring for the newest edition? Amir: You want a dongle? Jake: I don't need a dongle. I just want to have a dash. Amir: A dash is what you put it on. The dongle is how you connect it. Jake: This is that fuck you GPS. This is that fuck you navigation. All I have to do is mount it and plug it. Why, is this a USB-C? Amir: No, fuck no. You're asking me?