INTRO: AMIR: Hey, you're watching Jake and me! JAKE: Say your name. AMIR: Jinx! JAKE: Nope. AMIR: ..K. [Jake and Amir are sitting at their desks.] (Jake picks up his cell phone, calls someone, and holds it up to his ear.) JAKE: (to the phone) Yo! AMIR: (to Jake, thinking he is talking to him) Yo! JAKE: Yo yo! AMIR: Yo yo yo-- JAKE: Whattup, my man? AMIR: (laughs) I dunno-- JAKE: How are things? AMIR: Yeah, n- they're good. JAKE: Dude I have a question for you actually. AMIR: Wassap. JAKE: (speaking directly into the phone's mic) How's your mom? AMIR: She's fin-- JAKE: HAHAHAHAHAHhaha (continues laughing) AMIR: (laughing along) How's your mom? Heh.. What? JAKE: (laughing) Oh, no dude what happened to you last night? AMIR: I wen- I went home and I had a whole box of Saltines without water, which seems to be impossibl-- JAKE: Dude, you went home with her! AMIR: No I..-- JAKE: You did! AMIR: Did I? JAKE: You went home with her. AMIR: Who-- I know. JAKE: I know you. AMIR: I know me. JAKE: Don't-- Don't come to me like I don't know you. AMIR: HAHAh- I don't wanna.. do that. JAKE: I know you, man. AMIR: (laughing) I know you. JAKE: What do we always say? AMIR: (smiling) What do we say?-- JAKE: You tell me what we always say. AMIR: (smiling) How we say ittt, aahh! JAKE: We ride together, we die together, 'til the day we die, mothaf**kaa! AMIR: (trying to say it at the same time as Jake) --Die together.. (laughs hard) We do say that! JAKE: Seriously though man, I love you. AMIR: (goes quiet) Aah.. ehh..-- JAKE: Alright, it's good to hear from you. AMIR: Good to hear-... JAKE: We're breaking up, I think. AMIR: nAAH I love you too. JAKE: Hello? AMIR: Hello? JAKE: We're breaking up. AMIR: Why? JAKE: Noono we're back! AMIR: HAha! We're back! (in a bad Rick James impression) We're back James, bitch! JAKE: (to Amir) SHH! AMIR: SHH! SHH SHH! (dancing) SHH SHH, SHH SHH, SHH SHH, SHHHHHEOUGHHH (makes a rocket launch noise, then an explosion noise) JAKE: (to the phone) Aight dude, yeah, I should get back to work. But it's great to hear from you! Aight, I'll talk to you later. See ya, Joe! AMIR: See ya, Joe... JAKE: Aight, bye Joe. AMIR: You were on the phone. JAKE: (to Amir) Yeah. AMIR: (strung together, silly voice) For a split second I thought you were talking to me! JAKE: Yeah I was on the phone. AMIR: I know. (Amir gets up and throws water from a cup into Jake's face, then throws the cup down in his lap in anger.) JAKE: WHAT THE H-- END.