INTRO Jake - Hey, you're watching Jake and Am-- Amir - Let me guess! Jake - Jake and Amir. Amir - LET ME GUESS! (Amir is driving, Jake is in the passenger seat) AMIR: Hey, thanks for coming. JAKE: No problem, man. I'll go to a Yankee game anytime. (Amir chuckles) Hey, speed up a little bit, you're going like 8 miles per hour. AMIR: Yeah, what's the speed limit? JAKE: It's 65. AMIR: OK, I got a little wiggle room. JAKE: How'd you get the tickets, by the way? AMIR: Well they were super cheap. I guess no one wants to see the Reds play. JAKE: Why not, dude? It's inter-league play, at Yankee Stadium, it's pretty cool. AMIR: (laughs) Not quite at Yankee Stadium, the game is in Cincinnati. JAKE: All right, pull over. AMIR: Da-nati. JAKE: Pull over, man. AMIR: The nati, shasta macnati. What's up? JAKE: I said pull over, all right? I don't want to go to Cincinnati. AMIR: We're almost there, relax! JAKE: We are not almost there, we just left, OK? And the game is in two hours, we're going to miss it. AMIR: We're not - (sighs). The game is not in two hours, check the date, it's in 26 hours, idiot. OK, so we're barely going to miss it. JAKE: But we're still missing the game. AMIR: Yeah, a little bit, but what's the big deal when you got (high pitched) the Overbeck Pottery Museum! JAKE: Doesn't sound like it's in Cincinnati, it sounds like it's in Overbeck. AMIR: Yeah, well you're wrong, again, because it's not in either; it's in Cambridge City, Indiana, which sounds far away but it's actually only a six hour drive from Cincinnati, which means road trip #2! JAKE: OK, well I don't want to go on road trip number one, so just please pull over. AMIR: That's fine. You're just being a little bit of a buzz kill right now but what you need is a high level of the tickle monster! (lets go of wheel to try and tickle Jake) JAKE: OK, pull--Watch the road! Watch the road! AMIR: (grabs wheel again) Oh my god! JAKE: Geez! You're going to kill both of us. You're going to kill us. Let me drive. AMIR: N-n-n-n-no. I know what you're trying to do, you're trying to get me to let go of the steering wheel. It's not gonna happen, OK? I don't trust you. JAKE: (sighs) I know a short cut. AMIR: Do you? OK, let's stop right here then. (they pull into a parking lot and Amir gets out to walk around the van while Jake slides over inside) AMIR: (while walking around to other side) But I hope you realize that this move, this little switch, makes me the DJ of this party-mobile. That's right, all party tunes, all the time. Me and you, haha, OK, uh... (Jake pulls away while Amir is trying at the locked passenger door) AMIR: (on cell leaving voicemail) J.K., it's me, uh, (chuckles) you're an idiot. Look to your right, man. You are going to realize that I am not there. (chuckles again) (cut) Mom, it's me, yeah, uh, I'm kind of stranded. (cuts back to leaving a voicemail) Jake, you are going to be such an idiot when you look and realize I'm not there anymore. Come back, all right? Or call me, buh-bye. (tries calling again) Pick up. Pick up. Pick up. J.K. It's me, uh . . . THE END. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVvBC7RXPJ0