INTRO AMIR: Sup? JAKE: You're watching Jake and Amir right? AMIR: Sup? JAKE Stop. AMIR SU-rry... JAKE is working at his desk; AMIR enters wearing a cowboy hat. He awkwardly sits down and takes off the hat. AMIR [Boastfully]: Ohh, hats off to me. JAKE: Whoa! New haircut. AMIR: Yes sir [laughs] what do ya think? JAKE: You're kidding right? AMIR: Yeah, I'm kidding [laughs] why am I kidding? JAKE: It's obviously terrible AMIR [in a funny voice]: I know it, don't I know it? JAKE [in the same voice]: Then why'd you get it? AMIR: I got it because I needed a haircut but the girl obviously messed up bad! JAKE: So you sit down you were like; 'oh hey maam can I have the worst haircut ever?' AMIR [defensively]: No! I didn't which is why I'm going back there today and demanding my money, comes back to me. JAKE: Sounds about right, good job. AMIR: I'm gonna walk in there and be like look- JAKE [Interrupting]: You don't have to say anything, yeah, when it's that bad you just walk in. You walk in and you're like PSSH! Jake gestures to his hair. Amir shoots Jake a finger gun In agreement. AMIR: Sounds about right, sounds about right. JAKE: Yeah AMIR: What should I do until then because right now it's stuck in this bad state right? JAKE [shaking his head]: I don't know dude. AMIR [Aggressively/fighting back tears]: Well don't say 'I don't know dude' ehh? Because right now you're the only person who's actually telling it like it is so what do you think I should do? JAKE: I don't know what you want me to say. Amir slams his hands onto his desk violently. AMIR [Yelling]: Just give me some frikken advice okay? Everyone else is sugar coating it they're all like 'oh nice haircut bro, looking good' but I obviously don't okay? So please I need you right now just tell me what to do I don't know what to do! Amir slumps his head onto the desk and starts loudly sobbing. JAKE: Stop- It's fi- Amir continues to cry. JAKE: Dude I got you! Amir stops crying JAKE: Gotcha! Buddy? Amir looks up, sniffling. AMIR: I got you. JAKE: I was kidding, your-you got me? Amir cracks a smile JAKE: Got me. Amir is still struggling to keep from crying JAKE: Look at you; you're not really sad. Amir shakes his head. JAKE: You don't care. AMIR [still upset]: I don't give a crap. JAKE [positively]: That's good; we've got each other! AMIR: I got you... JAKE: We've got each other. AMIR [urgently]: We HAVE each other. JAKE: We got each other AMIR [Panicked]: We have each other! JAKE: We got...okay, we have each other we have each other! We have eachother we have each other! Amir slumps his head down onto the desk again. JAKE [Singing]: We have each other, we got the world... Amir joins in Together [Singing]: ...Spinnin' right in our hands baby, you and me. We gotta be, the luckiest dreamers who never stopped dreamin'