Amir: Question.
Jake: Is it about work?
Amir: Nn..mm..kind of.
Jake: So not at all then.
Amir: How the FUCK could you get a haircut?
Jake: ...How?
Amir: I mean...are you surprised with how I'm reacting to this?
Jake: I wanna be. I really do. Unfortunately, this is normal for you.
Amir: This is--this is--this is normal for me, right? This is normal for me?
Jake: What are you angry?
Amir: No. ...No, I'm not angry. (shrugs) I'm not angry at all. I'm fucking livid!
Jake: Why are you freaking out?
Amir: I don't know, I mean, psh, does the phrase matching haircut club mean anything to you?
Jake: No.
Amir: No. Eh, eh, eh, eh, (almost a coughing noise, with a head tilt each time)
Jake: You okay?
Amir: Eh, eh. No, you know what? Yeah, I'm okay. This is good. This is good--now I know.
Jake: I'm gonna get a soda. Try to relax, calm down.
Amir: Piggy front.
Jake: What?
Amir: Piggy front. Right now. (jumps on top of Jake)
Jake: What are you doing? Oh God.
Amir: We're even.
Jake: Fine.
Amir: BUT, you have to take me to Supercuts after work because I'm saying that I want this exact length--
Jake: Don't touch it.