[Jake and Amir are sitting on the couch.]
AMIR: (rapping) Yo yo yo, we wanna say, thank you, from the bottom of our heart, from the start, make--
JAKE: (as Amir raps) Ok let's not thank them in a rap. Let's not thank them in a rap.
AMIR: (still rapping) True dat, uh uh uh, why you do dat?
JAKE: Stop it.
JAKE: We want to thank you guys so much for donating.
AMIR: Hah, donating money maybe.
JAKE: No, donating money exactly.
AMIR: Exactly.
[Jake is now holding an acoustic guitar]
AMIR: And now the real reason you donated money: a song.
JAKE: And the only way I could convince Amir to do this. Ok.
(Jake starts playing Torn by Natalie Imbruglia)
AMIR: (singing) I thought I saw a man brought to life...
JAKE: Every little bit makes a difference.
AMIR: ...How? (laughs)
(Jake looks at Amir like he's the idiot)
AMIR: Don't look at me like I'm the idiot, you said the stupid thing this time!
AMIR: (singing) He was a warm, he came around, and he was dignified...
AMIR: Every time I donate, it feels- like,, it feels like to me,, like you know how-- alright, so like, when you go clothing fsh-, err sh-, shopping for groc- alright... focus.
JAKE: Yeah, focus.
AMIR: Now, if you donated more than twenty dollars, please click below to activate a special Jake and Amir joke, seen onl--
JAKE: What are you doing? How are you gonna do that?
AMIR: We'll figure something out--
JAKE: We'll figure it out?
AMIR: We'll do-- we can do it in post, right?
(The camera shakes back and forth, as if it were shaking its head no)
AMIR: That's a yes.
[Jake is now singing backup with Amir]
AMIR: (singing) Don't seem to know, seem to care, what your heart is for...
[Amir is on his phone]
JAKE: By working toge- you know, I just feel like it's really really insincere if you're doing that--
AMIR: I know I know I know I know, I'm just, I'm on my Google Reader thing
JAKE: Ok what's that, what is that--
AMIR: It's like an RSS aggregator.
JAKE: What does that do?
AMIR: I can get.. funny pictures and stuff on here.
JAKE: Can you please put it down?
AMIR: (singing passionately) There's just so many things, that I am searching for! (Jake joins in on backing vocals) I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel...
AMIR: Some people are donating money, other people are donating time...
JAKE: What are you donating?
AMIR: Nothing, and that's okay--
JAKE: It's not.
AMIR: I know, it's not. Which is why I'm.. gonna donate money.
JAKE: Ok. Do it.
AMIR: Ok, I will.
JAKE: Out with the wallet.
AMIR: Out with the wallet in with the n-- Out with the wallet in with the new.
JAKE: Take away- take out your wallet.
[Jake is singing backing vocals]
AMIR: (singing) I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn. (Jake stops singing) You're a little late, I'm already tornnnnn...
JAKE: Joking aside, we really do appreciate your donation. I know not everyone has a lot to give, but if we--
(Amir makes a farting noise with his mouth)
JAKE: (to Amir) ...Come on. Right? Come on.
AMIR: Come on.
JAKE: Joking aside,--
(Amir makes another fart noise)
AMIR: (singing) Oooooohhhh... ahhhyyeeaaaaahhhh... (Jake hits the final chord)
JAKE: (breaking character) That sounded kinda good at the end, you were really on.
(Amir breaks character and laughs)
END