Amir: [Speaking in different voice] Welcome to a mystical....
Jake: What is that accent?!
Amir: [Normal voice] Good question, Dutch.
[Amir is sitting at his desk with his computer. Jake is walking towards his own desk holding a bowl of cereal]
Amir: [Getting up] Ohh, here we go! [Runs up to Jake]
Jake: No! Heey hey hey hey look.... Chill out! Chill out!
[Amir collides with Jake and headbutts him, sending cereal flying everywhere. Both fall to the ground in pain]
Amir: [Yelling] Ohhh, whoo!
Jake: [Yelling, with bloody nose and blood on his face] WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
Amir: What?
Jake: Am I bleeding?
Amir: No....
Jake: [Crying] I'm fucking bleeding, man?
Amir: No I don't think so, I think it was a fake out.
Jake: What are you talking about?
Amir: I barely even.... Well I went like [mimes headbutting] but I think I pulled out before I hit you, I don't think I even hit you!
Jake: God, what is wrong with you?
Amir: Don't yell at me, OK? I'm in way worse pain than you are!
Jake: Why are you in worse pain than I am? We're in the same pain!
Amir: Yeah, but I'm feeling shame, OK? So that's worse!
Jake: WHY?
Amir: Why what?
Jake: We're in the middle of a conversation man! Just listen to me! Why is shame worse?
Amir: 'Cause at least you get to be angry, OK? That's a release!
Jake: I'M IN PAIN!
Amir: I'm in pain too! Plus in addition to that I have shame and blame, OK! Triple bagger!
Jake: Well I'm in shock!
Amir: Shock numbs the pain! Shock numbs the pain!
Jake: And I have confusion! I have betrayal!
Amir: That's shock! That's all just shock!
Jake: HOW IS BETRAYAL SHOCK?
Amir: Shock's ugly cousin: betrayal. Right? That's what they say!
Jake: NO, THEY DON'T!
Amir: They do, OK? I feel remorse, so I'm on like, I'm operating on like an emotional and a physical pain, you're just feeling the physical pain!
Jake: Ohh, I am bleeding dude! At least apologize!
Amir: No way man! I'm in way worse shape than you! I would kill to just have shock!
Jake: I DON'T JUST HAVE SHOCK!
Amir: All shock and no pain make you a dull you, man!
Jake: What changed? Why do you think I have no pain?
Amir: I'd kill for just shock.....
Jake: I have loss! Remember my cereal? And I feel damp, and uncomfortable, because I'm covered in milk, and blood!
Amir: You're a small, small man!
Jake: OK now you're insulting me, so you're adding insult to injury, and correct me if I'm wrong but you don't seem to be in that much pain!
Amir: [Normal tone] Yeah.... I guess I'm just bored. Come on, let's get up.
Jake: Get away from me man.
Amir: Nah, no rest for the weary. Let's go. One time!
[Amir takes Jake's hand and pull him up, making his head hit forcefully against the underside of his desk. Jake is knocked unconscious].
Amir: [Letting go of Jake, who falls to the ground] Ookay! Whoa! Hey! You can't be mad at me 'cause I'm feeling guilt! All right? Guilt, and shock's other ugly cousin.... happy.