JAKE: Hey, you're watching Jake and Amir.
AMIR: Ooh, bravo, bravo!
JAKE: (simultaneously) Shut up, shut up!
JAKE: Wow, this is my Xbox. I just bought it. What happened?
AMIR: Okay, I can explain. Sarah walked into the office, right? And she was all...
SARAH: (bounces in, new scene) Sup?
AMIR: Then Pat was all--
PAT: Sup?
SARAH: Aw hell no this is crazay in my nazay!
PAT: Oh no, I'm a dumbass nerd!
SARAH: And Sarah was all like, uh no shiatsu!
JAKE: So Sarah said, And Sarah was all like,?
AMIR: Will you let me finish, okay? Anyway--
GUY: Oh sheesh y'all--
GUY, SARAH, PAT: 'Twas a dream!
JAKE: Nobody said that!
GUY: You weren't there.
BRYAN: (enters) Yo so, my name is Byron Murphy, I like to drink curfee!
JAKE: So he said his name was Byron and he likes curfee. Cause that sounds like something you would say, because you don't know his name is Bryan and you don't know how to pronounce things, like coffee.
AMIR: And then--
PAT: I'm gaaaaay!
JAKE: Oh my God, just get to the Xbox!
AMIR: So I walk in, like a hero or whatever, and--
(new scene. Amir crushes Xbox with baseball bat)
JAKE: (in new scene, enters) Wow, what happened to my Xbox? This is ace. Dinner tonight?
AMIR (new scene): Uh, yeah, ha!
JAKE: (voice over) I never said that!
JAKE: (new scene) Didn't I?
JAKE (voice over): Nope.
JAKE: (new scene) Ah.
AMIR: (squeal noise)
(Jake in new scene grabs baseball bat. College Humor sign pops up)