[Intro]
Amir: Hey you're watching Jake and me [laughs] Tell me that wasn't cute
Jake: It wasn't
Amir: Yeah right
[Jake and Amir are sitting at their desks, Amir is making a high pitched groaning sound]
Jake: Something bothering you?
Amir: [Continues groaning]
Jake: If you're upset just tell me what it is, don't make the noise just tell me what's bothering you and we'll talk about it
Amir: [Still groaning]
Jake: Just tell me what it is!
Amir: My dog died okay? He was eaten by a wolf at my parent's house. There, are you happy?
Jake: [sighs] Sorry man
Amir: Sorry about what?
Jake: Sorry to hear that
Amir: Sorry to hear that? Or sorry that he died?
Jake: Both?
Amir: No... No I'm sorry something's not... Something's not adding up something's not making sense
Jake: I agree, yeah
Amir: If you killed my dog, you know you-
Jake: Okay I'm gonna stop you right there I didn't do that
Amir: So why are you apologizing hm? Why are you... What are you sorry about?
Jake: I'm sorry that a wolf ate your dog, [stutters] I didn't have anything to do with it
Amir: Whoah whoah, what'd you say? You're sorry that a wolf ate-
Jake and Amir: That a wolf ate your dog
Amir: I never said that a wolf ate my dog! Huh?
Jake: You did, it was the only thing you said to me actually
Amir: Did I?
Jake: Yeah
Amir: Yeah, right. Right, yeah dang it. You have to admit that would have been pretty clever though if i caught you like that
Jake: Sure yeah, it would have been
Amir: So you admit it!
Jake: Yes! That it would have been clever if you were right
[Silence]
Jake: I still feel like maybe you think I killed your dog
Amir: Yeah I'm like 50/50 on it
Jake: Do you think I'm a wolf?
Amir: Alright okay fine! I don't have a dog okay? I just wanted to catch you in a lie
Jake: You don't even have a dog? What are you talking about?
Amir: I just... you always catch me in lies I thought I'd catch you in one
Jake: Don't get sentimental and try to make me feel bad, this is the stupidest thing you've done in a long time and you carved my initials into your hand last week
Amir: Oh wow! Big whoop!
Jake: Oh god, you opened it up
Amir: Yeah, dang it
Jake: It's never gonna heal if you keep doing that-
Amir: I know that's the point!