Intro
A: Hey Jake, it's Amir. Are we recording the intro thing yet?
Jake: How'd you get this number?
A: uhuh
Jake's phone rings, Jake picks up phone
Jake: What?
Amir: Wow, I'm gonna hang up and we're gonna try that again.
Jake: If you hang up and call me back I'm not gonna pick up.
Amir: Ar-r-r-r-right let's keep taking, I don't have time for this.
Jake: But you had time to call me again?
[Amir laughs].
Amir: You got me. You have me.
Jake: Ok
Amir: I'm yours.
Jake: Stop it
Amir: Wazzaaap?
Jake: Nothing
Amir: J-just walking to work myself
Jake: I didn't ask you
Amir: But, you picked up the phone when I called which is as good as
Jake: Nope
Amir: Better than
Jake: Definitely not
Amir: Either way, I'm just walking to work and was wonder- oh my god I think I just stepped on a bum!
Jake: A bum? Are you serious?
Amir: Oh my god! No you know I think it was a baby
Jake: Oh my god that's so much worse. You re-step- a baby?
Amir: Uh scratch that scratch that, I think it might just be a bag of trash. Jake!
Jake: How do you not know what it is?
Amir: Oh my, okay. Relax, it was a baby. Laughs
Jake: Oh my god
Amir: Any hootie in the blowfish, just wanted to know if you wanted any breakfast from the Ds as I'm walking by one, going out of my way I might add
Jake: Well it's 3pm so breakfast is pretty much off the table, right?
Amir: Well, if you wanted and chick nuggs or some QPCs just LMK
Jake: Do you think I understand what you're saying when you sound like that?
Amir pauses: Yezz
Jake: Dammit, you're right
Amir: Whoa, whoa, whoa, they have a new 60 piece meal?
Jake: Wow, don't care
Amir: Holla Cheryl, haha I'm good. How's Teresa and the kids? Haha good. Can I get 3 20 piece meals aaand -
Jake: I don't want anything
Amir: I'm still thinking for me, ok? And another 4 piecer and let's throw another yoghurt parfait on the fryer, just cause I like the smell, thank you. Roberto! How are you doing dude? Yeah, Jake's fine, he's just being a little bitch man.
Jake: You know what, why don't you just not call me when you're walking to work? I have to talk to you when you get to work, so that's pretty much terrible to begin with.
[Amir appears in the office, carrying a McDonald's bag]
Amir: Hey! Yeah! Heard that whole thing, so thanks for that bro!
Jake: Yeah, I said it to you on the phone. How'd you get here so fast?
Amir is now on the floor asleep, shirtless, with the Jake and Amir puppets in his arms
Amir: (snort)- fast