INTRO
MIKE: Alright, we're recording.
AMIR: Alright, don't tell me what to do!
JAKE: Whoa, relax.
AMIR: What, you're gonna take his side?
AMIR/MIKE: To matching haircut club!
MIKE: Mm, man, my ex-partner never ate junk food.
AMIR: Whoa. You had a partner? That's awesome!
MIKE: You mean you never had a BF?
AMIR: Yeah I had a BF, Jake. Well, he was more of a BBF. And then he moved to California.
MIKE: Oh, San Fransisco?
AMIR: Nah, California. Hey! We should be partners!
MIKE: Amir, I'd really like that.
AMIR: Whoa ... don't touch me here, heh!
MIKE: I'm sorry, are you not out?
AMIR: No I'm not out, I'm in. And so are you! We're both in. God, you're so dumb.
MIKE: Sorry, I just assumed ... TICKLE FIGHT!
AMIR: Ah! Stop, no! Get away from me! We already tickle fought like five times earlier today, remember? I told you it's not fun when you let me win.
JAKE: So then Amir's like, "Oh sheesh y'all, 'twas a dream!"
AMANDA: Uh-huh.
JAKE: And then he says, "Nay, it actually happened."
AMANDA: Wow, that is another crazy Amir story.
JAKE: I know. Mandy, baby, honey, right here, he was obsessed with me, okay?
AMANDA: Oh, I bet he talked about you all the time.
JAKE: Thank you for saying that, all the time it was. Just come to work and be like "Jake Jake Jake Jake--"
AMANDA: Okay, Jacob, JACOB! Who is obsessed with who here?
JAKE: Oh my God ... you don't listen to me! He was obsessed with me, okay? Picture Amir in a penguin suit, I told you what he looked like.
THE END
JAKE: Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake Jake--
AMANDA: Jacob ... okay ENOUGH! DON'T!