INTRO
AMIR: Hi, you're watching Guy-Who-Ditches-His-Best-Friend and Amir.
(Mike, the new guy, puts flowers on his desk)
AMIR: Ahhhh, so drunk.
MIKE: You drunk right now?
AMIR: Last night. I was so drunk.
MIKE: Nice.
AMIR: I had, like, so many beers.
MIKE: H-how many? How many is so many?
AMIR: I was like, retarded.
MIKE: How many beers?
AMIR: Sixty.
MIKE: Sixty?!
AMIR: Uh..oh, like, I don't know.
MIKE: Wow! You are...awesome drinker.
AMIR: Really? (short throat clear) You know, you're...you're pretty ace yourself, Mike.
MIKE: Ace? Wh-what's ace?
AMIR: Hahaha. Listen man, if we're gonna be gullies, you gotta be able to talk the walk, er -
MIKE: Absolutely.
AMIR: And, you gotta be able to freestyle like me.
MIKE: You can freestyle?
AMIR: (freestyling) Oh, so, yo ho, I don't know. You tell me, son. Chillin' at the movies. Watchin' lots of movies. (normal) So.
MIKE: So...movies twice, then?
AMIR: I mean, no, well -
MIKE: No, it was ace.
AMIR: You know, I think you and me are gonna best co-workers forever.
MIKE: Oh, I'm sorry. I don- I don't - I don't work here. I'm just waiting for a friend.
AMIR: (clearly distraught) Oh...okay.
MIKE: Amir...I'm kidding.
AMIR: Haha haha hahahahahahahahahaha
(Amir's cell phone goes off. It's the Ace and Jocelyn theme song)
MIKE: Who's that?
AMIR: Uhhhhh (Amir closes his flip phone) Nobody.
MIKE: That's ace, man.
AMIR: Don't overdo it.
MIKE: I'm sorry.