(caption - Jake and Amir Behind the Scenes of "The Collegehumor Show" Sundays at 9:30/8:30c on MTV)
(Amir and Jake are on either side on Sam)
AMIR: We are here with Sam Reich, who is not only a writer and an actor on the show, he's also a producer--
SAM: (talking to someone off camera) Move the sign.
AMIR: H-h-hey, come on now. He's a producer--
SAM: It's too high.
AMIR: --and he's a director.
JAKE: Wow.
AMIR: One second, we're interviewing you, all right?
JAKE: Quadruple threat, boys.
AMIR: (chuckles) A triple threat.
JAKE: Quadruple.
AMIR: Threat.
(in Ricky's office)
JAKE: All right, we're here with Ricky Van Veen, our boss and the creator of CollegeHumor. We're days away from our premiere, (to Ricky) how do you feel?
RICKY: It's exciting! We're doing a lot of promos, trying to get people to watch.
AMIR: I'm going to give you fifty bucks, you give me carte blanche, all access pass to your e-mail. You leave the office, I need inbox, outbox, drafts, trash, what do you say?
RICKY: No.
JAKE: All right, Phantom, what do you prefer, writing or acting?
PHANTOM: I mean, that's like asking me if I like elk's blood or plum wine more.
AMIR: Plum wine?
PHANTOM: Yeah, I mean they're both great in their own way.
(back in Ricky's office)
AMIR: OK, eighty dollars to use your iPhone for two minutes.
JAKE: Come on!
AMIR: I'm already picking up the iPhone.
RICKY: No. Put down my iPhone.
AMIR: Give me eighty bucks.
RICKY: Seriously.
AMIR: Real quick, I have to call my mom!
(just Ricky and Jake)
RICKY: It's like every time that I think he's going to change, every time I think it's going to be different-it's not!
JAKE: You think it doesn't bother me?
(back with Sam)
AMIR: Whoa, Sammy.
JAKE: How much do we have left to shoot, Sam?
SAM: We have one week left of shooting.
AMIR: Wow, one week! Sounds super stressful. Plus we have my rap battle scene.
SAM: There's no rap battle scene.
AMIR: What's that?
SAM: There's no rap battle scene.
(Amir and Jake are on either side of Dan)
JAKE: We're here with Dan Gurewitch, a writer and actor on the show.
AMIR: Yup. Dan, who do you play on the CollegeHumor show?
DAN: Uh, Dan.
AMIR: Tell us a little bit about your character.
DAN: Uh, it's kind of like, all our characters, it's just like us, but more exaggerated, sort of dumber, more self-centered versions of ourselves.
AMIR: Well, Sam told me that my character was just me, like I'm not supposed to exaggerate, it's just uh, who I am. (chuckles) Or whatever.
DAN: Oh. Uh, that's--
(back to Phantom)
PHANTOM: Now here's the thing about MTV. It's like called what, music television, when was the last time they played a video?
AMIR: Yeah.
PHANTOM: For real. They'll play fifteen seconds of a video at the end of The Hills--
JAKE: Talk to us.
PHANTOM: --and then--
(back to Sam, Vinny is there)
VINNY: Uh, sorry, but we really have to go.
SAM: I know!
(they all start talking over each other)
AMIR: W-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-wait, I know--
VINNY: We really have to--(Amir pushes Vinny out of frame)
AMIR: we're also losing light.
SAM: I'd like to, what I've was saying was--
AMIR: (to Sam) Ah, we don't need light!
JAKE: Hey, it's fine. We're here with Sam Reich, actor-
(Vinny re-enters shot)
VINNY: It's his job to make sure that--
JAKE: --director, producer--
SAM: Shut the f**k up--
JAKE: --writer--
SAM: --seriously, guys. Seriously.
AMIR: OK.
SAM: I mean, it's funny, but we're losing daylight and we're trying to make an actual show.
AMIR: I know.
(Jake puts down his mic and walks off)
AMIR: I kn--I know.
SAM: This is in actual show that needs to go on actual television.
AMIR: Shhhhh...
Vinny: (off camera) I'm really sorry.
(Jake is also off camera, pulls Amir off)
AMIR: Uh, we'll be right back!
JAKE: No!
THE END.
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/3884361/jake-and-amir-behind-the-scenes-of-the-collegehumor-show-pt-1