[Jake and Amir are sitting at a table at a restaurant.]
AMIR: I'm not mad.
JAKE: You don't have a reason to be, so.
AMIR: Yeah, well we passed by two McDonald's on the way here?
JAKE: I remember, you tried- yeah, you tried to run into them.
AMIR: Yeah, well, lucky for you, I came prepared to this little shit hole, so. (Holds up a box of Chicken McNuggets.)
JAKE: Looks empty.
AMIR: (opening the box) What the hell? How did I already eat them?
JAKE: There's one in your mouth now.
AMIR: (taking a McNugget out of his mouth) Agh, God, that was weird. (laughs)
JAKE: Will you please put those away? I'm trying to teach you to eat like a regular person.
AMIR: Ok well regularly I eat forty to ninety McNuggets a day.
JAKE: Just look at the menu, ok? Just see if there's anything you can eat that's not a nugget.
AMIR: These prices are obscene! It's like $8.95 for a sandwich!
JAKE: You pay a dollar off the Dollar Menu for a nugget, right?
AMIR: Yeah..
JAKE: How many packs a day do you buy?
AMIR: ..Twenty..
JAKE: (stuttering in frustration) K well- th- what're you-
AMIR: I mean but they're only a dollar each!
JAKE: Exactly! It's...
AMIR: (high-pitched voice) Achekekedichediditee! (laughs)
JAKE: (surprised) I.. I didn't.. understand that one.
AMIR: I said, I think I'm going to sneeze, but then it went away. So.
JAKE: Did you say the whole thing? Like I'm gonna sneeze but then it went away?
AMIR: Nah, I said I think I'm gonna sneeze, and then (sneezes)
(Jake recoils in disgust.)
AMIR: (holding a penny) Whoa! A dime! A straight-up dime came out of my nose. (laughs)
JAKE: That's disgusting.
AMIR: (laughing) A ten cent piece came out of my nose!--
JAKE: That's a penny.
AMIR: Oh, okay. Either way, I'm paying for dinner tonight.
JAKE: It's.. one cent. So you're not.--
AMIR: Is it? Ok yeah. Well that's- that's what came out. Who knows what's still in there. Tickle my nose. (stretches his mouth up and down, exposing his nostrils)
JAKE: I'm not.. I don't wanna tickle your nose.
AMIR: Alright.
JAKE: Let's just make normal conversation that doesn't make me wanna throw up.
AMIR: Ok, fine. Uhhh... How is.. your.. motherrrrr...- I mean I don't wanna talk about stuff like that, it's boring!
JAKE: ...
AMIR: ...Dinner tonight?
(Jake gestures around, puzzled and frustrated by Amir's question.)