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Pick Up

Episode ID: 115

Air date: 2008-05-22

Video: Link

Scribe: u/PBdolphin23

JAKE: (Cell rings) Dad, what's up? It's late.

AMIR: Nope. Just me.

JAKE: (sighs) How?

AMIR: What? I switched our names in your phonebook so that when I called, you'd pick up.

JAKE: At least you're getting smarter. Still annoying. Smarter.

AMIR: Wow, Jakey, almost midnight, you're still awake?

JAKE: I-uh, yeah.

AMIR: Yeah, well, I stay up every night until 5, so. (high pitched) Whateva!

JAKE: That's not enough sleep.

AMIR: Stupid. I'm just wearing frozen turkey meatballs on my finger because I injured it.

JAKE: OK, goodnight.

AMIR: Wait! Aren't you going to ask why?

JAKE: Why--

AMIR: 'Cause I injured it.

JAKE: --do you keep calling me?

AMIR: I mean, athletes do it all the time. What's the big deal? It's called 'Athletes do it'.

JAKE: Bye.

AMIR: All the time.

JAKE: Hanging up.

AMIR: Ugh, what happens when you hang up?

JAKE: You just call me back.

AMIR: Right, so.

JAKE: I could turn off my phone.

AMIR: Ugh, if you do that, then I have to get to work early tomorrow and rearrange all the folders on your computer and it takes you forever to find everything; why don't we just talk like normal people and we'll end the conversation naturally, with both of us still falling asleep but on the phone. What's the big deal?

JAKE: If you like me, if you respect me, don't you just want to be nice to me? Maybe, in time, I could learn to be your friend.

AMIR: ...(laughs) No, I thought you were serious.

JAKE: (places phone by head, closes eyes)

AMIR: What do you want to talk about? Oh! I learned how to yell extra loud today. The trick is not to stop when you feel a burning sensation in your throat, ready? . . . Jake.

THE END.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyc7Xb3fUgg

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